Like anyone else, I have been through my share of "stuff" in life, and because of that, I don't wake up every single day full of sunshine and rainbows. I actively work every single day to feel good, and do good, and I work very hard to try to be a positive person. Some days I am wildly successful, and other days I am the biggest failure ever. But, the more I commit to a healthy lifestyle, the good days are easier to come by. Because of how hard I work on being positive, the more resentful I feel of people who make it their life's mission to destroy those who dare to smile. I think people who are negative/toxic think that if anyone is happy, than either they are a nit-wit, or just have it so flipping easy in life that of course they're happy. I don't expect everyone to be the same, or handle life's difficulties the same, but what I do expect is mutual respect. I used to drown my sorrows in all kinds of different, unhealthy ways, so I fully understand that mentality, but don't be irritated with me, or make fun of me because I now make different choices, and I choose to deal with my feelings. When I was a more toxic person, I always enjoyed being around people with a sunnier attitude than mine, I found it refreshing, especially when you know that the sunny attitude is a choice that we make, and not always an easy one. And I certainly never wished for anyone to feel as miserable as I did. As a matter of fact, I did a lot of my drinking and crying alone, just because who wants to watch someone's tears in their beer's?
The people that I have to deal with are happy for someone if they buy a new car and are happy, or buy a new house, clothing, so on and so forth, but if you stop smoking, drinking, decide to dedicate your life to helping others, decide to be happy in any non- medicated, organic way, well they will aggressively work on knocking you down. I do not talk about anything that makes me feel good, or sad for that matter to anyone where I live. I don't take food with me to work, because I have been made fun of too many times, and I have been dragged down to many times, and at a point you get exhausted from pulling yourself up.
I know I'm certainly not the only one to have to deal with happiness vampires. It's sad that trying to be healthy and happy, and believe in something good, especially in a rather dark world we live in, can be seen as a bad thing, and something that needs to be stolen, and trampled out. It's another attitude, like racism that seems to be passed down from one generation to another.
I don't know what the answer is, because it's so ingrained I don't even think a lot of the people realize how negative they are. They would probably deny any kind of negative influence on the world, so it's a tough one to fix I fear. The only thing really that you can do is nurture and protect your happiness. It sucks, because most of us when something makes us happy, we radiate, and want to spread this knowledge to the world, but it's just not always safe. Just because other people choose to be unhealthy and negative, doesn't mean that they know more than you know, it doesn't make them wiser, or tougher. I find the truly miserable people to be some of the most ignorant, because they already have it all figured out, and they never learn, or listen, unless it's more negative speak. It seems illogical to say that choosing positivity can be lonely, but in my case it has proven to be true. But the fact that I like myself more than I ever have is enough for me to keep pursuing inner health and happiness. Plus, while I am certainly not the most vain person, I am human, and if you really look at these negative Nellie types, they look sallow, wrinkly, and just kind of blah. But if you look at people who are kind to themselves, others, animals, and the planet, well they just have a radiance that is beautiful from the inside out, and that's what I strive for. So protect your happiness and health, and let it flourish where it's appreciated.
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