Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Letting Go.....

Today is only Wednesday, and it's the last day of 2014. I am freaking out a little bit, because so far, I am having kind of the worst week I've had in a really long time. Monday was my birthday, and there was a time in my life where I would have had an apartment full of friends, this year I spent it with my cats crying. It's like a really cliché movie from the early 2000's. I spotted Robin on my deck eating food, on Monday, so I opened the door, and he didn't just run from me, he hauled ass. Like all the way down the steps, and through the yard. None of the feral cats run from me. They keep their distance, but they know by now I won't hurt them. It has really dropped in temperature, and I am just so heartbroken. I assume he ran because he doesn't want to come back inside. As someone who deeply loves, and respects animals, I feel that I have to respect that Robin wants to be wild. But I just can't get over the strangeness of it all. At no point prior to his escape did he ever show any sign of wanting to be outside. Even in the beginning, when he was very scared of me, he still loved lounging on the bed, and the couch like a king. He seemed content from the start. My door will always be open to him if he has a change of heart, and I am always going to worry about him. There are some mean alley cats who come around to eat, and I hate thinking of Robin's sweet temperament slowly being turned by the streets. It's so horribly cold outside, it just feels like death. I remember the first episode of The Walking Dead, the city was just so deserted, and lifeless, and there was obviously a darkness. That's what winter here reminds me of. ( I no longer can watch The Walking Dead, as it got progressively more gory and graphic as the series went on. )  Anyway, thank you to anyone who sent positive vibes. At least I know that he's staying somewhat close, because he knows where the food is at, and I can't imagine that there is a lot of prey out there. I hope maybe the cold will make him remember his favorite cozy spot on the bed.
Be safe tonight!!

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Gray, Grey, Slate

This is the time of year when a lot of people take stock of their lives, and vow to make changes. I know lots of go to the gym, stop smoking, eat healthy type of resolutions are made, and very quickly broken. And I know from my own personal experience how reverting back to old, unhealthy ways not only takes it's toll on you physically, but also mentally. And then it become an endless stream of numbing your anger at yourself in more negative ways.
I wanted to share something I've come to realize that has really helped me on my own journey. It doesn't have to be so black and white. If you TRULY want to stop, or start something, it might not be a smooth journey. You might have setbacks, and fall into your old ways, and that is normal. We are creatures of habit after all. When I really knew I was ready, and wanted to be done with my eating disorder, for the first year, I had a few binges, and instead of admitting defeat, and going backwards,(which I had done in the past) I woke up the next day, and continued to live my life as a recovered bulimic. It naturally worked it's way out, because I let it. I didn't want to be bulimic anymore, so I didn't use those temporary setbacks as an excuse to go back to my old ways.
Something a lot of people I've known do is get a membership at a gym, and go hard for a good month, and then one week comes where they are busy, and don't go, and then next thing you know one week turns into a year. Then the cycle continues the next New Year, I swear, gyms, and organic, healthy food companies must LOVE the month of January. Ha. But, you don't have to go everyday, for a whole hour. It's okay if you miss a week for whatever reason, just ease back into it. I also try to tell people how many amazing workouts are on YouTube, which means you can fit your workouts to your schedule. You could do half in the morning, half in the evening. But again, I feel the difference is when you really are ready for change, versus just saying it. You have to be ready to do the work, whatever change it is that you want to make.
If you really, really want to make improvements, just don't let anything stop you. If you fall, don't quit, just get up, hold your head up, and keep going. Habits are like old friends who have become toxic, but are still kind of fun. They are hard to give up, even when you are so ready. But something my journey has taught me is feeling good, and doing good can become a habit if you have the patience to let it become a habit. The way coffee and countless cigarettes used to get me going for the day, is now replaced by soothing green tea, blogging, and yoga. (And a little TMZ, I'm only human) And I feel so much happier. I can't believe that's how I used to nourish my body in the morning.
I feel like you have to give yourself three months at least to fully benefit from healthy changes. When I quit smoking cigarettes, it took at least three months before I could be around a smoker without wanting to steal their cig and smoke my way to chemical bliss.
What I'm really trying to say, as someone who has quit a lot of bad habits, and started a few good ones, is that it really can be done. And just don't let setbacks set you all the way back. Every person who has made changes has had setbacks, I don't care what anyone says. And there is no kind of love like self love. I kind of hate myself for saying that, it sounds so corny, but it is so true. And the body responds so well to kindness, and in turn everything works as it should.
Self love for 2015!!

Monday, December 29, 2014

OOOOPPPS!

I wanted to correct my little mistake. The recipe for the seitan that rocked my world came from Essential vegan via Twitter. I'm as dorky on twitter as I am on this blog, and so I sent a tweet to Fat Gay Vegan telling him how awesome his recipe was, and I had to be gently corrected. Totally embarrassing, but when you're a lifelong dork, you get used to it.
Have a day full of Seitan!! (The seitan/satan jokes just never get old with me.)

Seitan, I'll Never Quit You Again!

So Quinoa and Seitan are two foods I struggle hardcore with cooking. No matter how I prepare quinoa it is a soggy, unappetizing mess. Here's what really annoys me about this dickish little seed, one time I attempted to make a quinoa porridge, so that the sogginess would be fine. Well, that porridge was a dry, uncooked abomination that really I should never speak of again. And I have tried what I feel like is every recipe/suggestion out there. The quinoa that is in my cupboard now has been blended, and turned into quinoa flour, to be used in facial masks. Quinoa has tons of nutrients that are great for the skin, such as vitamin a , and lysine which is necessary for your skin to produce collagen.
Seitan is another food that seems so simple, and looks so easy and delicious, yet no matter who's recipe I follow, it's always a letdown. But I like seitan, when it's made by anyone else. It really frustrates me when I make batch after batch of too soft, too hard, not enough flavor, and so on and so forth. Well, I made one last attempt at seitan, to use up the wheat gluten flour that was lingering in the back of my fridge, and I made the best seitan I have ever had in my life yesterday, made by little ole ME!! I'm not sure if I'm allowed to write the recipe, but I think I can, as it was on Twitter, and it was posted in The Vegan Chat Room, and I believe the recipe is from The Fat Gay Vegan. I hope I'm not breaking any rules, or being obnoxious, but I have to spread the news of this seitan, for anyone else who has struggled, we have been saved!! I knew right away from the texture, and smell of the dough that I was close to success. The recipe is super simple, as is the prep and cook.
1cup vital wheat gluten
3 tbls. nutritional yeast
1/2 cup water
1/4 C. soy sauce
1 tbls. E. V. olive oil
juice of one lemon. (I forgot this ingredient. oops it was still amazing)
3 cloves of garlic ( I used 1 tbls. of garlic powder, which in my opinion worked fine)
Stir all ingredients until a dough is formed, and then knead gently for three minutes. The dough is perfect, not to squishy and wet, not too dry.
For the broth, the recipe calls for eight cups of veg broth, mixed with 1/4 C. soy sauce. I used eight cups of water, and a veg cube to make my "broth". Let the broth mixture come up to a boil, then lower it down to a simmer, break the dough into pieces whatever size you would like, and let simmer for thirty minutes, uncovered. Then, turn off heat, put a lid on the pot, and let the seitan sit in the broth for another fifteen minutes. Then you have perfect seitan, ready to be crisped up. I sliced up two of my pieces and sautéed them in some coconut oil, and man what a treat. It passed taste, and texture. I will never attempt another seitan recipe again. And these little seitan pieces are blank slates for whatever additional flavorings, sauces you want to add. They do need to be crisped up, as they come out of the broth a little soft, and dare I say brainy? They would be very scary to a skeptical non-vegan.
Today I'm going to marinate some of the pieces in a buffalo style sauce and make Seitan wings!
If you are like me, and feel like you just don't have what it takes to make seitan, please don't give up, try this recipe first!!
Still no sign of Robin. Tomorrow it will be a week since he ran for the hills. It's still pretty mild for winter in the snow belt, but temps are dropping. Where are you Robin???
If you also cannot cook quinoa, you can make quinoa flour in the blender, just like oat flour with oatmeal. It takes a little longer, but within a minute or so you will have quinoa flour, for gluten free baking, or anti aging face masks! Just mix quinoa flour with bananas (also GREAT for skin), or avocado, put some green or white tea bags on your eyes, and in ten or twenty minutes(depending on how much time you have) you will look like a fresh faced you!

Sunday, December 28, 2014

Because I'm Healthy

The more I focus on health, and really trying to radiate from the inside out, the more I notice how unhealthy the people around me are. This country in general. I'm not even talking about the obesity rates, I'm talking about how it seems to be ingrained in us to go, go, go, take a pill, or get a shot if you're sick, but for the love of all, keep going. And everything is a chore. I was listening to various conversations this season about the holidays, and everyone was just bogged down by what needed to be done. And any kind of daytime talk/help show is full of tips to cut your stress. We are a drugged up, stressed out, sleep deprived country. And it seems like all we value is money, success, and how hard we work. You are lazy if you consider 40 hours a week full time work.
I learned through personal experience that  poor health equals no happiness. It's hard to feel happy about anything when you feel like shit. However, as I have learned when you're healthy, you bounce back quicker from life's little shake-ups. I feel like I am much better at handling, and working on solutions to things that make me unhappy now, versus back in all of my self destructive ways. I used to just get over whelmed, and just do more damage to myself, and my life. I see that pattern so clearly now, and I want to shout from the tallest building how great it feels to be an active participant in your own health. It's better than any drink, food, cigarette, or pill. And as someone who used to be so full of self hatred, it feels amazing to not be carrying around that burden. And I know from experience that certain toxic behaviors become almost like a hard, protective wall around you, keeping you protected from the harshness of life. It's like you don't really care that much about yourself, so you really have no empathy for anyone else. I notice that a lot in some of the super unhealthy people I know. They just have a hardness that I saw in my former self. I don't know anyone who really is healthy here. I know people who go to a gym, but they still smoke, and drink, and eat crap because somewhere along the way they came to the conclusion that a trip to the gym three times a week cancels out everything bad.
In addition to learning how alive racism really is, I have really learned how unhealthy some people choose to live. I don't think it's a coincidence that hatred, and toxicity are very prevalent in unhealthy people. There is also a strong will to continue this behavior, and pass it along to future generations. If a doctor has the audacity to suggest someone quit smoking, and perhaps move their body more, well that doctor gets an eye roll, and the honor of being considered nothing more than a quack. I've tried telling some of my co-workers that you can get used to feeling great very quickly, and just naturally want to continue feeling great, but I am met with rather hostile side eyes.
This is not what I was going to write about today. I was going to write about pantry staples. But I am just so sick of being teased, and side eyed when I talk about anything healthy, to the point that any progress I make is like a deep dark secret, and this blog is the only place I can safely talk about health, and happiness. Also, the temps have dropped a little and it was raining pretty hard when I woke up, so my mind is filled with Robin.
To sum up my babble a thon, I want this world to be a kinder place for everyone. And kindness comes from love, and love has to start with yourself. I don't mean to sound corny, but I truly believe that. I don't care how many side eyes any of us get, the truth is that we can heal ourselves, and we can love ourselves, and feel great. So I  have just now decided that 2015 is my year to be proud of feeling good. I will no longer feel ashamed of  doing all I can to maintain my health without the need of any pills or potions.

Saturday, December 27, 2014

Mushrooms really are Magic!!

So I made a sandwich last week that was so delicious that I was dancing and singing all around my apartment after eating it. It's funny how something so simple as a sandwich can really satisfy you. I love always having some kind of crusty bread on hand, so when salads get boring, put it on some bread, and bam a veggie delight, minus any shady, possibly cancerous ingredients.
But back to my happy sandwich. I bought a few Portobello mushrooms, marinated them in red wine vinegar, olive oil,(evoo in Rachel Ray speak) and salt, pepper, Italian seasonings. I let them marinate for a couple of hours, and then baked them for about twenty, or twenty five minutes. The temp was around the 350 mark. While they were roasting away, I made a little relish of chopped olives, and banana peppers. I toasted a baguette, smeared on some Just Mayo, put lots of my spicy relish, and then added the thinly sliced, delicious mushrooms. It was perfection. It was creamy, crunchy, meaty(?!) spicy, vinegary, and a little salty, in the good olivey kind of way. And it couldn't have been easier. I really recommend trying this combo.
If your local grocery has a bulk olive section, I recommend taking advantage of it. I get a little assortment of fancy olives and spend under two dollars. And since the olives haven't been sitting around in a can for who knows how long, they have much more flavor. And that means it doesn't take much to make an impact. My favorites are the big Kalamata olives, and the green olives with crushed red pepper. Yum.
I think mushrooms are a really good food to eat, especially in the winter, as they have lots of vitamin D, which most of us don't get enough of in the winter. I try to remember to eat mushrooms at least once a week. And they are so much tastier than yucky old cow juice.
Still no sign of Robin. But I am now hoping for a New Years miracle.

Friday, December 26, 2014

Dance of the Coconut Sugar Plum Fairies

I hope everyone had a warm and wonderful holiday. And I hope tons of delicious vegan food was consumed by many.
I have to be honest, I have been sitting here for an hour trying to write this damn thing. I have three different things written down to blog about, it's just that truth be told, my heart is still very heavy over Robin running away. I'm very worried about him. What is he eating? Where is he sleeping? I don't know why he ran away that day. I go outside multiple times a day to feed the neighborhood strays, and he has never once shown any interest in being outside. I haven't given up all hope, but I am very sad, and worried.  And I don't have the energy to write about pantry staples right now, because I don't care. Pantry staples aren't keeping Robin safe. I have to save my phoniness for work. There is no way I can express my sadness or worry over an animal at work.
On a not completely unrelated note, I experimented with coconut sugar. I made vegan brownies, and used coconut sugar in place of white, as a way to I guess have my brownies, and eat them too. In case anyone is wondering, it was a success. I used coconut sugar in my tea, and it dissolved, and was sweet, and I noticed no difference in the brownies. I also added peppermint extract and they were like a brownie version of a thin mint cookie. Yum. The problem is that I ate too many brownies while looking outside and crying. And everyone knows cry eating is the same as mindless eating, which is dangerous. Anyway, I recommend coconut sugar as far as taste, but wow the price. The bag I bought was on sale for like $ 4.50, for a one pound bag. So, yes pricier than regular sugar, but worth it. Have you ever eaten too many sweets, and the next day you have a sugar hangover? No coconut sugar hangover. I didn't feel as dirty after eating these brownies either. Which is both a good and bad thing.

Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Still Hoping for A Christmas Miracle.

Still no sign of Robin. I'm pretty devastated if I'm being totally honest. Whenever you read about feral cats, you don't often read of humans as a danger, or threat, however where I live,  I have heard more than one person talk about shooting unwanted neighborhood cats. Seriously, I live in a Wal-Mart commercial. This has kind of knocked the wind out of my sails, and I can't really think straight. To be sophisticated, I'm fraught with worry.
I hope tomorrow is filled with love, and cheer, and good feelings for everyone, holiday or not. And I hope tons of delicious vegan food is served, and non vegans realize that vegans eat delicious foods too.

Tuesday, December 23, 2014

Sad

This morning as I was coming in from feeding the outdoor kitties, for some reason little Robin decided to run outside. I have no idea why, he has never shown any interest in being outside. I tried to get him, and he ran off of my deck. I have weird sleeping habits, so it's very early, meaning I would get arrested for yelling too loud, and I saw him run into my neighbor's yard, and I went to get him, and he ran away. I an so devastated right now. It's oddly mild this week, in the forties and fifties, but I know that will soon change. Not to mention it's supposed to be really rainy this week. I hope he comes back, or at least comes to the deck when he's hungry, and I can grab him again. I can't stop crying, and of course I have to pull it together, as I have to be in with the public.  I thought he was happy, and he even seemed to like me a little. I keep looking at his spot on my couch, expecting to see his little face. Please send good vibes to Robin.

Monday, December 22, 2014

Beware of the Bully, or Bully, Beware?

I have great news, and bad/weird news. I'll start with the weird, and end on a high note! I just read a terrifying article in the Huffington Post about Coca Cola, the company. Apparently the sales of soda are slightly declining, so Coke has decided to get into the dairy game. They are going to be rolling out a brand new milk called Fairlife. (Not for the cows.) It is going to be heavily marketed as a "premium milk", boasting 50 percent more protein, which Americans seem to be truly obsessed over. The Atkins trend just switched to Paleo. Anyway, Coke also owns the Simply line of orange juices, and whatever other flavors, and makes a killing, so they figured why not go milk. I shudder to think of what they are doing in their little labs to make this milk so much more protein packed. I have no reason to believe that this won't be a hit. I can name twenty plus people off the top of my head who will be buying this, just because a) the label says it's more healthy, and that combined with b) the higher price means it must be true!
Okay, from one bully to the next, here is my good news! Unilever has decided to drop their ridiculous lawsuit against Just Mayo. I read one article that said Unilever's lawyers decided that a win was impossible. Another article I read states that Unilever didn't give a reason. When someone is so aggressive, then gives up so quietly, there are a lot of words in that silence. (Take note, Bill Cosby) Anyway, I say who cares why, I only care that someone handed them some common sense. And, in the end, I'm sure Unilever introduced tons of grateful people to the deliciousness that is Just Mayo, while showing what true dumbasses they are.
I also forgot to put Just Mayo on my splurge list. I feel so bad because Veganaise was keeping vegans slathered in the good stuff for so long, and it has even passed the taste test of many non-vegans, but in my humble opinion, I will always choose just mayo. It is so creamy, and spreadable, the first time I used it I had to double check the ingredients, I thought for sure I accidently grabbed a new brand of non vegan mayo. So, if you haven't yet tried it, I really recommend it for any of your mayo needs.